With the love of a good man...

Yesterday could not have brought more anxiety with it. So much that I slept through most of the day. Not only was there the anxiety surrounding school, but there was the additional anxiety of driving 3 hours away from my children and trying not to die. I was freaked out because I had slept instead of writing little notes to all of the kids telling them to have a good day and that I loved them just so they would have something... you know, just in case.

The more anxious I got, the more withdrawn I became. The more withdrawn I became the more bouncy Chowder became. He has been flitting around the house for days going on and on about how excited he is that I am going back to school and aren't I excited and isn't this just so great. And though sweet and endearing it was working on my every last frazzled nerve.

Let me step back here a second to explain that Chowder and I aren't the most lovey dovey couple in the world. We tend to express our devotion to each other with big nose jokes. (both of us have them) Chowder expresses his love in a very similar fashion to a 4th grade boy. When out to dinner while we were dating he once tried to saw my arm off with a butter knife. He would want to tell me how great a moment was but instead he would give me a wet willy. You get the picture. Back to my story.

My mom and I finally got off with Sweeting in the backseat. By the time we got to Terre Haute we had lost and hour in the time zone change and it was nearly 9:00. We drove around lost in Terre Haute looking for something to eat and finally made it to campus at nearly 10:00. The campus was dark and the Welcome Center was of course closed by this time so I had to call the security guard to come get me my key so we could get into the guest house. No smiling welcome with balloons and confetti. After settling Sweeting for the night, I looked forward to the reassurance of talking to Chowder. But when I called him I have no reception. none. My mom's phone had no reception. I went outside. no reception. I tried to call from the phone in the hall. no long distance. the phone in our room. no long distance. I tossed and turned all night without that thread of connection and hope.

I woke up this morning with my stomach in knots. Still there was no reception. I got Sweeting and myself ready and walked over to the library for the presentations. I was barely keeping it all bottled in. As I took a step into the library, my alert went off on my phone. It was a text message from Chowder.

Have a great day. You are awesome. I love you lots.

yeah.
took my breath away, too.